Since you and I spend time together willingly -- and not mindlessly (except for that thing with
the Real World, which I know you won't tell anyone about) -- can we come to an agreement about some things? Please?
Can you please tell the writers of
Heroes to start applying Strunk and White's principle #17 of ommitting needless words to the storylines and subplots? Tell them to x-out some of that ridiculous dialogue and sappy plot development and just get to the cool comic book stuff. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the Hiro-Ando business (because it's somehow the best written stuff on the show...except for the incessant mentions of the "Nissan Versa, it's right outside!"), and I have high hopes for the new Christopher Eccleston character. Nathan Petrelli, on the other hand, needs a hair cut. He looks like Jughead. And Mohinder Suresh's psuedo-philosophical narrating is tiresome and puts me to sleep. More powers and using them, less finding out about the dynamics between the people with the powers. Oh, and tell them that HRG really shouldn't have a gun. It's not convincing.
Also, send a memo to those folks at
LOST about Jack and Kate. WE DON'T CARE ANY MORE. And by "We," I mean me.
I will reserve my usual ire about the Food Network programming you've somehow let continue. I've let the thumbs-down button on the TiVO remote do the talking for me (and you're "on notice" as it were, Sandra Lee, Cans McMange, and Rachael Ray). By the way, thanks for cooperating with the TiVO. Your work together has given me much less to complain about.
Finally, can you please do something about that Alex Trebek? He is weird, and the only reason we know this is because Jeopardy! is on twice a day. If, somehow, I make it past the contestant's pool into the random contestant search and then onto the show I might recant, but in the mean time just have him read questions and cut the ancillary comments. You might consider sending him a copy of Strunk and White as well.
PS: How is it that Explanator remains the highest-rated show on Monday nights? Honestly. For a show that relies on David Caruso explaining something and then a cg zoom to that thing which he just finished explaining, it sure is catering to the least attentive denominator out there. You, my dear friend, can do better.